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Fantasy Bucket: The Walking Dedmon

March 12, 2018

By Elvis Gutierrez

The Atlantank Hawks are nearing towards the end of a horrendous season and looking ahead to the draft lottery. The only bright spot in these dark times is their 7-foot center whose last name pretty much sums up the state of the franchise.

First Bucket: Dewayne Dedmon

Dedmon has been one of the Hawks’ best players this season especially after returning from injury a couple of months ago. This week, he averaged 9 ppg, 7 rpg, 2 bpg, and 1.3 spg. Who knew that the only Hawks player looking alive right now is the walking Dedmon?


Second Bucket: Kyle O’Quinn

Ever since The Unicorn, Kristaps Porzingis, went down with a season-ending injury, O’Quinn became the Knicks’ “heart and soul” and the team’s (literally) biggest cheerleader. He has been stepping up in the front court with averages of 10 ppg, 5rpg, 3.3apg, 3.3 bpg, and 1 spg for the week. Who needs The Unicorn when you got the…nevermind.


Third Bucket: Bojan Bogdanovic

BojBog, as we fondly call him in our league, has been the better Bogdanovic lately. He has surpassed his brother from another mother in fantasy this week with averages of 21 ppg, 4 rpg, 2.5 3s, and 2 spg.


Fourth Bucket: JaVale McGee

The former Shaqtin a Fool MVP is the most unexpected member of this week’s Fantasy Bucket. He has surpassed Zaza “The Bonecrusher” Pachulia as the Warriors’ starting center and has done an admirable job with averages of 12 ppg, 5 rpg, 2 bpg, and 1 spg for the week. But, of course, don’t expect that to last.


Fifth Bucket: Robert Covington

The Lord Covington has been struggling for quite awhile and I’ve attempted some buy-low offers before the trade deadline passed, to no avail. But I knew that The Lord will somehow, someway, bless his owners with a trickle or a boatload of blocks,steals, and 3s when it’s all said and done. In the past week or so, he did just that with averages of 13 ppg, 4.5 rpg, 3 apg, 2.7 3s, 2.2 spg, and 1.7 bpg. Lahdamercy.